“What’s My Motivation?”

A stereotypical method actor, while preparing for a scene in a film or play, has been known to query his director with, “What’s my motivation?” Many have been speculating about the motivation of the Boston bombing suspects. The older brother, Tamerlan Tsarnaev, clearly appears to have been a follower of radical Islamic fundamentalism, the bomb-making, killer of men, women and children kind. The younger brother, Dzhokher Tsarnaev, seems to have been a bit of a Mini Me killer to his older sibling. That they were motivated by radical Islam seems not to be in doubt, unless one is a member of the media, work in the Obama administration, or is their whacky mother. Tsarnaev Family Values would have made an exciting reality TV show, especially when mom and daughter-in-law head to the mall to shop (lift).

Many folks seem to be searching for any reason other than they were radical Islamic terrorists to explain the latest episode of, well, radical Islamic terrorism. Time magazine wondered if Tamerlan’s boxing career may have caused him to blow up Americans. This explanation would only be plausible if the intended target was Don King. Others have suggested that they were disaffected youths who used radical Islam as an excuse to kill and maim. This line of thinking posits that they didn’t really believe in such nonsense, despite the fact that mom has stated Tamerlan was willing to die for Islam. Rather, they were merely play acting with the director explaining their motivation.

If not radical Islam, then what else could it be? It couldn’t be considered workplace violence, like Fort Hood. Tamerlan Tsarnaev didn’t have a job and even the Obama administration couldn’t pull that one off. (Apparently, when Fort Hood shooter Nidal Malik Hasan shouted “Allah Akbar” it was translated as “I need covered parking!”)

Allow me to suggest this motive: resume enhancement. Perhaps the brothers Tsarnaev simply wanted to teach college courses. The leftist radicals of the 1960s and 1970s, like the Weather Underground, were also well versed in bomb making, bomb throwing and murder as a vocation. Some of these terrorists went to jail. Others went to jail and then found good jobs as faculty members at prestigious American universities. Maybe the Boston bombers just wanted to become adjunct professors at Columbia University.

Prior to learning the identities of the bombers, many in the media were quick to suggest that it must have been the work of, stop me if you’ve heard this before, anti-government right-wing extremists. Much like nearly every calamity over the past few years, anti-government right-wing extremists were considered the usual prime suspects. And, as usual, that thinking was wrong. Just ask National Public Radio’s correspondent, Dina Temple-Raston. Before we knew who was responsible, she said her sources were “leaning” toward believing that the bombing was the work of home grown right-wing individuals. “April is a big month for anti-government and right-wing individuals,” Temple-Raston said. She cited the Oklahoma City bombing, Waco, Columbine and, naturally, Adolph Hitler’s birthday. Of course, Columbine had as much to do with right-wing politics as Jim Carrey has to do with quality film making. Perhaps next time Ms. Temple-Raston should use sources that fall somewhere outside the NPR newsroom.

No doubt, even after the identities of the bombers were known, many in the media still searched for any remnants of the Tea Party in Dagastan. It was, after all, April 15 and also Patriot’s Day in Boston. Overlooked in all the media analysis pointing the finger at anti-government right-wing types was the basic fact that it was the Boston Marathon. The terrorists clearly wanted an event where there would be lots of people. This explains why they did not consider setting off bombs at a Miami Marlins game.

Late word has come out that the brothers were planning to go to New York City after the Boston bombing to commit another heinous act – purchasing multiple Big Gulps. Fortunately, Mayor Michael Bloomberg, as always, was ready to leap into action.

And in one last bit of recent disturbing news – Anthony Weiner is back on Twitter. Hide the women and children!

Curtice Mang is the author of the new book, The Constitution – I’m Not Kidding and Other Tales of Liberal Folly. He can be contacted at www.mangwrites.com, where one can also purchase his book; or contact Curtice at mangwrites at cox.net.