Who’s In Charge?

Who’s in charge? This is the question many Americans have been asking in the aftermath of the attack on the Libyan consulate that left four Americans dead. That question should not be confused with the Abbott and Costello routine, “Who’s on First?”, although Lou Costello seemed less confused in that comedy bit than the Obama administration has been in trying deny, obfuscate or pass blame elsewhere. In his recent debate performance, Joe Biden rolled so many others under the bus that the White House needed a convoy.

Remember the ad that Hillary Clinton’s campaign ran during the 2008 Democratic primaries, the one that asked who you wanted answering the phone at 3:00 a.m.? (Or was it 2:00 a.m.? Either way, the only people normally awake at that time of the morning are college under grads or jazz musicians.) Democratic primary voters and Americans at-large determined in that election that they wanted Barack Obama to take those calls. Barack Obama, it turns out, wants Hillary Clinton to answer those calls. That seems to be the only conclusion that can be drawn from Obama’s decision to let Hillary take the fall for the Benghazi consulate security lapses.

So, with that in mind, we can presume that when that 3:00 a.m. phone call to the White House comes in the automated phone message goes something like this:

We’re sorry, our office hours are from 9:00 a.m. to 5:00 p.m. Monday through Friday. Your call is important to us. Please listen closely as our menu options have changed.

Press 1 if this is an emergency and you need to speak to someone immediately. Your call will be transferred to the State Department.

Press 2 if you want to pass blame onto someone else. Your call will be transferred to the State Department.

Press 3 if you want to blame George Bush specifically for something.

Press 4 if you wish to discuss how the Romney campaign is politicizing the attack on the Libyan consulate.

Press 5 for your free Obama phone.

Press 6 if you would like more information about Fast and Furious. You will be disconnected.

Press 7 to speak with someone in the media. To speak directly to Chris Matthews, please press 67622.

Press 8 to make a contribution to the Obama 2012 campaign. You will be redirected to 1-800-AXELROD.

To speak with someone about the national debt, press 16,860,275,816,523. Please note that this menu option is changed daily.

If you wish to lodge a complaint, we are sorry but our complaint line is temporarily out of service. We expect to have the complaint line available to take your calls in January 2013 or January 2017, depending upon the outcome of the election.

Please remember that President Barack Obama and Vice President Joe Biden speak for themselves, but do not speak for the administration. To speak to someone who does speak for the administration, press 7 again.

Thanks you for calling and have a great day!

Curtice Mang is the author of the new book, The Constitution – I’m Not Kidding and Other Tales of Liberal Folly. He can be contacted at www.mangwrites.com, where one can also purchase his book; or contact Curtice at mangwrites at cox.net.